Wknd Box Office: Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Brave, Lola Versus

Here is an interesting article from http://www.debbieschlussel.com/ reviewing some of the movies that came out over the past weekend. This follows this post some of the movies from last week and THIS POST about some movies that have been released over the past few years that you might have missed! This all follows this post about guidelines to chosing good movies to watch yourself!






Wknd Box Office: Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Brave, Lola Versus

By Debbie Schlussel



I really liked one of the new movies out at theaters this weekend. The rest were “eh.”



* “Seeking a Friend for the End of the World“: While this is definitely for adults only (it’s chock full of sexual themes, drug use, and R-rated language), I really enjoyed this movie. It’s very funny, romantic, and charming. But it’s the kind of movie guys will like, too.


It’s the end of the world. The news broadcasts that everyone only has three weeks to live because an asteroid is heading toward earth. Because of that, people quit their jobs, there are no more flights, people use illegal drugs and party non-stop, there are riots, and magazines stop publishing. One magazine is shown with the cover, “Last issue – The Best of Humanity,” and it bears pictures of Jesus and Oprah. Oprah? Are you kidding? They must be?



Steve Carell is an unhappy, bored insurance agent, whose wife leaves him when she learns the world will soon end. His neighbor, Keira Knightley, is in her late 20s and has just dumped her boyfriend. With riots surrounding their building, they escape and travel to see the true love of his life and to take her to fly in a private plane home to England to say good-bye to her parents. But the story is really about their journey and what happens to them and between them along the way. I’m not a fan of Knightley, but she didn’t really get in the way here. The best thing about the movie is that the male lead character played by Carell is a real mensch and class act.


Some who’ve seen it have said the ending is a “rip-off.” Not so. It ends perfectly and at just the right time. Anything different really would have been a rip-off.



TWO-AND-A-HALF REAGANS






* “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter“: I hated this movie. I’m all for historical movies and even historical fiction movies. But this was just stupid and has nothing at all to do with history. And, as I understand from a friend who read it, the book is much better. Still, I’ve already said on this site that I don’t like these concepts of turning Lincoln into a vampire hunter and other similarly silly premises. It’s all about liberal disrespect and tearing down of authority and historical authority figures we revere in America. When I first wrote about that, a commenter suggested we write a book about Barack Obama, vampire bloodsucker. The thing is, he makes a silly cameo at the end of this movie (well a Black arm of a man who is supposed to be him does) as a vampire hunter. Huh? He won’t even fight Islamic terrorists, illegal aliens, or a bad economy. Vampires would make mincemeat of him. Also, in this movie, the vampires are mostly Confederates and slavery supporters, which is not the case in the book (which has vampires on both sides), so it’s an anti-Southern, anti-red state movie.



The story: Abraham Lincoln’s mother is murdered by a vampire. He becomes a vampire hunter with a mentor who sends him to Illinois. Lincoln decides that if the vampire hunter stuff doesn’t work out, he can always run for office, and soon he’s in the White House fighting off the vampires. The movie has Lincoln accompanies by his magical Black friend who stays at the White House with him, while Mrs. Lincoln consults Harriet Tubman to go on the underground railroad to escape the vampires like Black slaves escaped slavers. Huh? Just stupid. And the special effects and stunt weren’t believable either.



Skip this messy, stupid movie and read some history books about the real Abraham Lincoln. This vampire stuff is for the birds . . . and gullible teens searching for heartthrobs. Where is John Wilkes Booth when you need him to put a movie out of its misery? Sadly, he was nowhere to be seen in this horrid flick.



ONE-HALF MARX
* “Brave“: Disney has been pushing this Pixar 3-D animated kids movie big-time. But it doesn’t live up to the hype. The story is kind of dull and laced with feminist she-manism, like all movies aimed at girls, these days. All the men in the movie are dopes, per usual. And it’s kind of dark, both in color and story. Also, I was surprised that, even though it’s animated, this kids movie had a scene showing all the men walking with their naked butts to the screen. Why do Disney and Pixar feel the need to push the envelope like this with young kids?



A Scottish princess is dismayed when her mother, the queen, wants to marry her off. The princess wants to spend her time riding horses, hunting, and shooting her bow and arrow in the forest. So, she goes to the woods and seeks out a witch to cast a spell on her mother. The spell turns her mother into a grizzly bear and she must beat the clock to keep her mother from permanently turning into a bear. Her father, the king, is an incompetent, drunken dope who lost his leg to a grizzly bear and wants to party and kill the grizzly.



ONE-HALF REAGAN PLUS TWO BETTY FRIEDANS




* “Lola Versus“: I will never understand why anyone finds self-absorbed, navel-gazing hipsters interesting. And so it goes with this waste of time movie chock-filled with annoying people badly in need of help and common sense. There are a few funny lines in this movie, but mostly it will annoy the heck out of you. Lola (Greta Gerwig) is engaged to her artist boyfriend in New York. But he dumps her and she starts feeling sorry for herself with a bunch of unattractive, weirdo friends and sleeps around with everyone including her ex-fiance. The end. Ick. Two hours of life gone forever, wasted on this dreck. Don’t do what I did. Skip it. No charm was involved in the making of this movie.



FOUR MARXES